Frustration, Anxiety, and Conflict What makes a

Conflict This is generally when two side have some kind of opposing ideas about something that effects both sides: taxes and welfare, Time spent together versus time working for economic gain.
There will always be some kind of conflict in your life. The key is to find a compromise where both sides can get some of what they want. It is usually impossible to get all of what you want, unless you agree to fall on your sword this time hoping for a full chance next time around.
Compromise
Negotiation
Open communication<br>

Stress This is not one identifiable thing. Stress is a demand that is placed upon you by the environment.
Major stress: a single event that is unexpected that causes you to have to change or postpone your goals.
Minor stress: an inconvenience that delays work, family time, income, or some other regularly occurring event.
Background stress: a recurring event that may not directly involve you that, none-the-less, inflicts some minor harm to you, your family or property.<br>

What’s important to remember about any kind of stress is your ability to cope is limited. Think of your ability to cope as a “thing,” (a glass of water, an hourglass full of sand). The more you are stressed, the more that material is lost, and once your ability to cope is gone, you lose control of yourself, your life, and your goals.
Therefore keeping your coping skills in good shape is very important.
Keep a good sense of humour
Exercise
Have good family support
Have trusted friends that you can talk to
Be able to have some control over your emotions<br>

The Vapours! During the 1800’s (and in some old movies) it used to be common to see a woman get very emotional (excited or very worried) and she would waft her hand in front of her face. Eventually she would faint. Why?
It was thought that there were gasses in the air that, if you inhaled too much, would cause you to faint. These were ….. The Vapours!
In fact, what was the real reason women fainted? (Kiera Knightly in Pirates of the Carribean)
Doctors in the 1800’s believed that the source of women’s emotional instability was the uterus (womb). Therefore, if it were removed, you would make a woman more calm: Hysterectomy – removing a woman’s Hysteria<br>

Nervous breakdown Even up through the 1950’s people talked about having these. Do your nerves really break down? No.
What they were talking about was a breakdown of a person’s ability to cope with stress. A person grew so worried, so stressed that they could no cope with life, nor could they take care of themselves. They were hospitalized, given medication and given “talk” therapy. It was hoped that a person could regain their coping ability and rejoin society.
It was not uncommon in the 1950’s and previous decades. Does this happen as much today?
No. People don’t believe in it anymore.<br>

Bone pointing Ninjas A man from Haiti left his family and came to Florida, U.S.A. He was happy, but his family was not. They went to a voodoo priestess and asked that he be killed. The priestess put a curse on a piece of bone wrapped in human hair. She then gave it to a man to go and find the errant son.
The son who came to the U.S. did not really believe in voodoo, but knew the stories. One day the messenger from the priestess found the young man (while he was at work). He said no words, but pulled out the bone and pointed it silently at the young man.
Within 24 hours the young man who had left his family to come to the U.S. was dead. What happened?<br>

Belief in a concept Although the young man had said that he didn’t believe in voodoo, seeing the bone pointed at him was too much for him to handle. He immediately knew what it meant.
He didn’t want to believe, but had heard the stories of voodoo many times as a child; and he was afraid.
If you are in a state of extreme fear your heart rate increases, blood pressure increases and the body is under enormous pressure.
He was so fearful for such a long period of time that his blood pressure dropped too far and his heart gave out. So who really killed him?<br>

Dracula Comes to my door In the early 1970’s Christopher Lee (“Lord of the Rings”) played Dracula in a series of low budget horror movies that were in fact very successful.
The actor was driving with his pregnant wife in the south of Spain. During a late evening drive to their next destination, his wife started going into labour. They were in a very rural country area far from the nearest city.
In a panic, the young actor rushed across a pasture to a small farm house. Wearing dark clothing and knocking on door in the dark the actor waited for an answer. The door opened just a crack, and before Lee could say what was going on, the man who answered the door screamed, “It’s HIM!” and slammed the door shut – in fear for his life.<br>

Some things make us more susceptible to stress You are highly emotional

You already have a personality disorder:
Histrionic personality
Anxious personality
Obsessive – Compulsive personality

It may be that you have a stressful life already and simply don’t have the energy or coping ability to handle any more stress than you have now.<br>

Locus of Control Intrinsic: People who feel they have control over their own lives seem to be more content than those who don’t. They feel they have some control over what happens to them.
“I make things happen” – they might say

Extrinsic: People who don’t feel that they have control over their own lives often feel that everything is fate, and nothing they do can change that.
“Things happen to me” – they might say<br>

To Lessen Stress Be aware of exactly what the problem is
Do what you can, but try not to worry
Have a regular exercise plan
Make time for yourself and family
Be a better problem solver
Be an active participant in your life
When a problem comes up, seek advice right away
Realize that there will be problems, but they are not insurmountable
Drug abuse is not an escape, it’s the start of a new problem<br>