Name It, Tame It - PowerPoint Presentation

Slide1

Name It, Tame ItAn introduction to emotion coaching

Will Calver, Slide2

Each local authority in England must make arrangements to promote co-operation between— .

(a

) the authority; (b) each of the authority’s relevant partners; and .(c) such other persons or bodies as the authority consider appropriate, being persons or bodies of any nature who exercise functions or are engaged in activities in relation to children in the authority’s area. The arrangements are to be made with a view to improving the well-being of children in the authority’s area so far as relating to— .(a) physical and mental health and emotional well-being; (b) protection from harm and neglect; (c) education, training and recreation; (d) the contribution made by them to society; (e) social and economic well-being;

Why are we talking about enhancing the emotional well-being of LAC and care leavers today?

Children Act 2004Slide3

Please complete the questionnaire sheet using column A only.

Select

how you would respond in each of the scenarios.Slide4

That every young person looked after by their institution/Local Authority feels supported with their emotions

That every young person looked after by their

Institution/Local Authority is asked if they feel supported with their emotions (impact)That all services within an institution/Local Authority that support LAC/Care Leavers, consider training their staff to adopt emotion coaching as a new skillWhat do we want to achieve from emotion coaching?Slide5

What could be put in place to enable Local Authorities to know if young people are feeling supported with their emotions?

One way could be a PEP

question: Do you feel supported with your emotions? Which could be accompanied by a scale…Slide6

What is emotion coaching?A practice for supporting

young people

to identify and manage their emotions through enhanced communicationWho can learn it?Anyone can learn to support the emotions of others, many adults do it.Why are we targeting staff that support Looked After Children and Care Leavers with Emotion Coaching?Because 63% of young people are taken into care because of abuse, and will be experiencing strong emotionsThe majority of young people taken from their parents will be feeling separation anxietyWhy should colleagues in Local Authorities be supporting the emotions of learners?Because a learner experiencing strong emotions may not be able to focus upon their education. By helping them to manage their emotions you will be enhancing their achievementSlide7

Emotion coaching is based on the assumption that emotions drive behaviour.

Casey and Schlosser (1994) found that 7-14

yr olds with an externalizing disorder displayed poorer emotional awareness than control groupsSaarni (1999) without the ability to identify the specific emotion that one is experiencing, choosing an appropriate and effective strategy to alleviate this state will largely be inadequate Why focus on emotions?Slide8

What are the objectives for emotion coaching training?

To support staff to

feel confident to help young people to identify, validate and manage their emotionsFor staff to know how they can enable young people to identify their emotions and create strategies to manage themFor staff to become aware how they respond to the behaviours of young people and to be willing to understand the emotions the drive them For staff to know the importance of empathy in emotion coaching and how to use it effectivelyFor staff to know how they can co-regulate with young peopleFor young people to self-regulate their emotionsSlide9

Where did Emotion Coaching come from?

Developed in the US by psychologist John

Gottman (1997)Based on research into what parents of happy, resilient and well-adjusted young people actually doRecognises the scientific evidence that what adults do shapes and strengthens brain development in childrenFound that the brain is shaped by social experience and strengthened by repetition© Kate Cairns AssociatesSlide10

Emotion coaching is helping young people to: identify their emotions; know that they are normal and create strategies to manage

them

Emotion coaching is not: discussing the circumstances where emotions may have come from or addressing the underlying causes of emotionsIt is about dealing with the here and now, not the past…..Slide11

Open questions on emotion coachingPlease write down 5 open questions on the subject of emotion coaching:Can I be an emotion coach?Slide12

What happens to a person’s body when they experience a strong emotion?

Heart rate increase

Blood pressures raisesSweating increasesAdrenaline is released into the bodyBreathing speeds upBlood is moved away from the stomach to major musclesLegs and hands may shake in preparation for fight or flightMay feel like vomiting or going to the toiletSympathetic Nervous System is engagedCould you focus on your education in fight or flight?Slide13

If a child experiences regular abuse and trauma before being taken into care, what types of emotions could be triggered on a daily basis?

Shame

FearAngerMistrustRageAfraidPanicHateSlide14

Now that you know some of the emotions that LAC may experience, predict what behaviours they may cause (from the list you have created).

Shame:

could cause avoidant behaviourSlide15

Empathy-How can it help us with emotion coaching?

Working in small groups, using the flip chart pad and pens on your table write down a definition of empathy.

Empathy-The ability to share someone else’s feelings or experience by imagining what it would be like to be in their situation.http://dictionary.cambridge Slide16

Understanding empathy

For Carl Rogers empathy is

‘To sense the clients personal world as if it were your own, but without ever losing the “as if” quality – this is empathy…(1957:99)Counsellors practising Empathy need to ‘get into the shoes of their client’ or ‘under their skin’ (Nelson Jones 1995: 38) in order to try and understand the clients subjective world. Hough 2008Which word sums up the meaning of empathy? UnderstandingWhat is it we are trying to understand in emotion coaching?Slide17

Why is empathy important in emotion coaching?

In

your groups, write down a scenario of a conversation that could happen between a professional and young person to highlight how empathy can be used in emotion coaching.Slide18

‘Understanding alone is 70% of the solution and sometimes the only solution needed’Michael Quinn Family Caring Trust

2003

Once you have understood and established the link between the behaviour and the emotions, try to decide how you can bring about a positive change.Slide19

Response Styles

Thanks to Kate Cairns for allowing us to use their materialSlide20

Responses to Behaviour

Four main styles of adult response to a young person’s behaviour:

DisapprovingDismissingLaissez faire Emotion coachingAdapted from Kate Cairns Associates 2013Slide21

Disapproving Style:

Disapproves of negative and positive emotions

Lacks empathy Discipline, reprimand or punish the behaviourFocuses on solutions to improve the behaviour rather than the emotions driving the behaviourMay regard negative emotions as manipulation Often motivated by need to control and regain power, or to ‘toughen up the young person’ - Adapted from Kate Cairns Associates 2013Slide22

Dismissive Style

:

Wants to make the young person feel better but is uncomfortable with negative emotionsViews negative emotions as toxic – to be ‘got over’ quickly Thinks paying attention to such emotions makes them worse Tries to stop emotions by reducing or minimising them – making light of their significance (that’s life, you’ll be fine’)Focuses on getting rid of the emotion with logic or distraction rather than understanding the feelings - Adapted from Kate Cairns Associates 2013Slide23

Disapproving and dismissive styles The actual message the young person is hearing is……….

‘I can’t trust my own feelings’ Leading to the young person lacking capacity to make decisions Leading to the young person suppressing natural emotionsCan generate more negative feelings in the young person – resentment, shame, angerThe young person is not given the opportunities to experience emotions and deal with them effectively , so could grow up unprepared for life's challenges Adapted from Kate Cairns Associates 2013Slide24

Laissez Faire style

The young person receives no guidance from the adult on how to manage their feelings

Once the adult is in laissez faire, the behaviour will escalate Can occur when the adult is overwhelmed by the power of emotions driving the young person (adult may feel afraid, distressed or helpless) Despite the empathy of the adult, the young person experiences no safe containment of their emotions - Adapted from Kate Cairns Associates 2013Slide25

Emotion Coaching style

Identify

and name the emotionAcknowledge the emotion as normalEmpathise with the emotion Name it, tame it! Setting limits on behaviour Builds relationships Problem solving with the young person to create strategies to manage their emotions Slide26

ACTIVITY - Response to behaviour

Adapted from Kate Cairns Associates 2013

High EmpathyLow GuidanceLow EmpathyHigh GuidanceSlide27

ACTIVITY - Response to behaviour

Adapted from Kate Cairns Associates 2013

High EmpathyLow GuidanceLow EmpathyHigh GuidanceEmotion coaching styleDisapproving style

Dismissive

style

Laissez-faire styleSlide28

ACTIVITY - Response to behaviour Task- place the statements in the relevant quadrant in response to the following statement:A young person is anxious, scared of attending an apprenticeship interview

Adapted from Kate Cairns Associates 2013

High EmpathyLow GuidanceLow EmpathyHigh GuidanceIdentify the feelings, validate them and discuss coping strategies

Discuss how they are feeling

Tell the young person that being anxious is being silly and they are wasting people’s time and offer them a way to encourage attendance

Tell the young person it will be fine, you’ve done loads of interviews, everyone gets nervousSlide29

Response StylesACTIVITY 1Reflecting on the information covered so far, please reconsider the answers you gave in column A. Identify anything you would change in column B.

Please complete the questionnaire sheet individually Slide30

Emotion coaching involves…

… a practical three-step approach to dealing with behaviour in the

momentStep 1Recognising, empathising, validating the feelings and labelling themStep 2Setting limits on behaviourStep 3Problem-solving with the young personAdapted from Kate Cairns Associates 2013Slide31

Step 1Empathise, validate, label

Recognise all emotions as being natural and normal and not a matter of choice

Look for physical and verbal signs of the emotion being feltTake on the young person’s perspective (attunement, mentalising/mindednessUse words to reflect back the young person’s emotion and help them to label the emotionAffirm and empathise, allowing the young person to calm through co-regulationProvide a narrative for the emotional experience, creating cognitive links through teaching/educationAdapted from Kate Cairns Associates 2013Slide32

Step 2

Set LimitsEstablish RapportBuild on attunement with young personMirror neurons then create engagement the social and emotional brainIt is important that adults set the social and emotional tone – not the adult reflecting back the anger or distress of the young person, but the young person being able to respond and reflect back the calm and empathic face of the adultThen teaching State the boundary limits of behaviourMake clear that some behaviours will not be accepted

Adapted from Kate Cairns Associates 2013Slide33

Step 3Problem solve with the young person

When the young person is calm and in a relaxed state –

Explore the feelings that give rise to the behaviour, problem or incidentRemember that all feelings are acceptableWe manage our feelings by making choices about how we respondScaffold – alternative ideas and actions that could lead to more appropriate and productive outcomesEmpower – the young person to believe they can overcome difficulties and manage their own feelings and behaviour Adapted from Kate Cairns Associates 2013Slide34

Things to consider when delivering emotion coachingIn your groups write down the things that you need to do to make your emotion coaching effectiveSlide35

Activity in silence

Working on your own, think about an instance in your life where you will commit to trying the emotion coaching approachSlide36

‘Understanding alone is 70% of the solution and sometimes the only solution needed’Michael Quinn Family Caring Trust

2003

Once you have understood and established the link between the behaviour and the emotions, try to decide how you can bring about a positive change.Slide37

Saarni, C (1999). The development of emotional competence

, New York: Guildford

Casey,R.J., & Schlosser,S. (1994) Emotional responses to peer praise in children with and without diagnosed externalizing disorder. Merrill-Palmer Quarterly, 40, 60-81.http://dictionary.cambridge.org retrieved 27/1/2014 9.30am Hough M 2010 Counselling Skills and Theory Hodder Education UKKate Cairns Associates 2013 www.kca.org References