Affirmation Sam Crabtree all rights reserved Practicing Affirmation 3 x 5 T he most eyeopening thing you have discovered in your years as a counselor Practicing Affirmation Practicing ID: 161542
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Slide1
Practicing
Affirmation
Sam Crabtree
all rights reservedSlide2
Practicing
AffirmationSlide3
3 x 5…
T
he most eye-opening thing you have discovered in your years as a counselor…
Practicing
AffirmationSlide4
Practicing
AffirmationSlide5
Session 1
Affirmation:
The Problem and Opportunity
for Every Person
The Pervasive, Universal, Non-optional Mechanism
That God Has Wired Into the Universe
Practicing
AffirmationSlide6
Practicing
Affirmation
God-centered Praise
of Those Who Are Not GodSlide7
Practicing affirmation is
not
about
self-esteem.
It is about esteeming the work of
Godin the lives of people.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide8
Jails are overrun with people who have plenty of self-esteem.
So are asylums.
(Chesterton)
Practicing
AffirmationSlide9
Folly and sin conspire to make us desire to be made much of, thinking that we
deserve
to be loved.
This is idolatrous and deadly.
It is about esteeming the work of
Godi
n the lives of people.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide10
Practicing affirmation is
not
about
self-esteem.
It is about esteeming the work of
Godin the lives of people.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide11
You are not the author of your story.
Your story isn’t mainly about you.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide12
A key is not the
main
thing,
but it is a
crucial
thing.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide13
Affirmation is not optional.
That is, doing it and not doing it
both produce an effect.
They do not produce the
same
effect.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide14
A fire not stoked goes out.
A refrigerator unplugged rots the eggs.
A garden not tended produces weeds, not vegetables.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide15
Affirmation is the fire-stoking,
refrigerator-electrifying, garden-tending aspect of relationships.
It is not optional.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide16
The principles of affirmation apply universally to all human relationships…
…including your relationship with God.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide17
Mistake: failing to grasp the connection between lack of affirmation and one’s own reputation.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide18
Practicing
Affirmation
The Mercy of the
Lordt
o Youin Affirming OthersSlide19
2Timothy 1:16-18
The Lord grant mercy to the house of Onesiphorus for
he often refreshed me
,
and was not ashamed of my chains; but when he was in Rome, he eagerly searched for me, and found me – the Lord grant to him to find mercy from the Lord on that day – and you know very well
what services he rendered at Ephesus.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide20
Unless physiologically driven, depression is a signal that something in my life has become more important than God.
Depressed persons need mercy.
Refreshing others (including affirmations) introduces mercy. (see p54)
3. Oppositional
Practicing
AffirmationSlide21
Romans 15:2-3
Let each of us please his neighbor for his good, to build him up. For Christ did not please himself, but as it is written, "The reproaches of those who reproached you fell on me."
Practicing
AffirmationSlide22
The Affirmation Ratio presupposes things like:
n
God
sovereignly brings about ends through means.
n
Believers
are dependent upon the Spirit.n
Love affirms; love also corrects.n
Everything
can’t be said in one seminar.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide23
The Affirmation Ratio presupposes things like:
n
Our behavior does not save us.
Jesus
alone
is our justification.
The root of every sin is idolatry.
Idolatry is a failure to look to Jesus alone. Idols thwarted bring discouragement, anger,
anxiety, etc.
So d
on’t make practicing affirmation an idol.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide24
Proverbs 11:25
He who refreshes others will himself be refreshed.
n
It is the law of the harvest.
n
Caution: God (not others) is the ultimate
source of our refreshment.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide25
Matthew 10:42
And whoever in the name of a disciple gives to one of these little ones even a cup of cold water to drink, truly I say to you, he shall not lose his reward.
n
God
rewards
us
when we refresh others.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide26
Caution:
n
Self-interest is not selfishness.
n
Though we benefit from refreshing others, the refreshment is theirs and is to be real refreshment.
Romans 15:2
Each of us is to please his neighbor for his good, to his edification.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide27
“Though boys throw stones at frogs in sport, the frogs do not die in sport, but in earnest.”
Bion
of
Borysthenes
(Greek philosopher)
Practicing
AffirmationSlide28
Sustain the Weary With a God-given Tongue
Isaiah 50:4
The Lord GOD has given me the tongue of those who are taught, that I may know how to sustain with a word him who is weary.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide29
Peanuts Cartoon
(removed for copyright reasons)
Practicing
AffirmationSlide30
Affirmation Ratio
Correction
1. Stop hearing the correction2. Stop hearing you
3. Oppositional
Practicing
AffirmationSlide31
Practicing
Affirmation
insufficient
affirmation
p
lenty of healthyaffirmation
Natural winds blow to the left.
Correction accelerates that wind.
Practicing affirmation is non-optional.Slide32
Affirmation Ratio
Correction
1. Stop hearing the correction2. Stop hearing you3. Oppositional
Practicing
AffirmationSlide33
Affirmation Ratio
Correction
Consider it like a checking account.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide34
Affirmation Ratio
This is about earning the right
to be heard, gaining a hearing.People are influenced by those who praise them.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide35
Gang behavior
Practicing
AffirmationSlide36
Affirmation Ratio
n
You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.n A spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down.
3. Oppositional
Practicing
AffirmationSlide37
“We readily believe those whom we know to be desirous of our welfare.”
John Calvin
3. Oppositional
Practicing
AffirmationSlide38
Richard Baxter, Puritan writer:
“They love those who best esteem them highest.
“The faults of these admirers can be extenuated and easily forgiven…”
[Isn’t that what you want? Forgiveness to flow?]
“If you would have his favor, let him hear that you have magnified him behind his back and that you honor him.”3. Oppositional
Practicing
AffirmationSlide39
C.S. Lewis
“When Christians behave badly, or fail to behave well, we are making Christianity unbelievable to the outside world…
“We give them grounds for talking in a way that throws doubt on the truth of Christianity itself.”
3. Oppositional
Practicing
AffirmationSlide40
Stop and pray…
…for grace to practice affirmation.
3. Oppositional
Practicing
AffirmationSlide41
Practicing
AffirmationSlide42
Session 2
The God-centeredness of
Good Affirmation
Biblical Warrant for God-centered Praise
of Those Who Are Not God
Practicing
AffirmationSlide43
Affirmation is the purpose of the universe… specifically, affirmation of God.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide44
The chief end of God is not to glorify man, but the chief end of man is to glorify God by enjoying him forever.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide45
Isaiah 48:11
My
glory I will not give to another.
Problem:
If all glory belongs to God, how can we commend those who are not God?
Practicing
AffirmationSlide46
Two ways to miss the mark:
Idolatrous commendation
Failing to commend the commendable
(James 4:17):
When Jesus says, “Render unto Caesar that which is Caesar’s and unto God that which is God’s,” he is not forbidding people to pay tribute to Caesar.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide47
No glory is stolen from God when:
Daniel praises Nebuchadnezzar
Daniel honors Darius
Gabriel singles out Mary
The writer of Hebrews commends Abel, Enoch, Noah, Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, Moses’ parents,
Rahab, Gideon, Barak, Samson,
Jephthah, David, Samuel, the prophets, the martyrs.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide48
Daniel 2:37-38
You
, O king, the king of kings, to whom the God of heaven has given the kingdom, the power, and the might, and the glory
,
and into whose hand he has given, wherever they dwell, the children of man, the beasts of the field, and the birds of the heavens, making you rule over them all-
Practicing
AffirmationSlide49
No glory is stolen from God when:
Daniel praises Nebuchadnezzar
Daniel honors Darius
Gabriel singles out Mary
The writer of Hebrews commends Abel, Enoch, Noah, Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, Moses’ parents,
Rahab, Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, David, Samuel, the prophets, the martyrs.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide50
No glory is stolen from God when:
He himself affirms Noah (righteous)
Pharaoh affirms Joseph (wise)
Boaz commends Ruth (worthy, virtuous)
Saul commends David (better than he)
Achish affirms David (blameless)The woman praises Elijah (godly, truthful)
The centurion values his servantPaul commends Phoebe (servant heart)
Practicing
AffirmationSlide51
Jesus commends:
H
is disciples as salt and light
H
is listeners as better than many sparrows
The woman of great faithThe woman of ill reputeThe faith of the centurion
John with superlativesThe generosity of the widowNathaniel for lack of hypocrisy
Practicing
AffirmationSlide52
John 8:1-11
(the woman caught in adultery)
Neither do I condemn you; go and sin no more.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide53
God is at work everywhere.
See it.
Affirm it.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide54
The gospel of the God who is at work is not merely something to look at, but a way of looking.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide55
What is affirmation?
Affirmation commends the past.
Encouragement pleads for a future.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide56
What is affirmation?
Truthfully declaring by complimentary word or action the goodness of something or someone.
All good affirmation attests or confirms that which honors God, that which is morally upright.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide57
Therefore, to affirm people well, we must learn to affirm God, the source of every good thing to be affirmed in people.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide58
How can you praise a mere human in a God-centered way?
Commend the character of Christ in them.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide59
Salvation is not in a code,
but in a person.
So it is with character.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide60
To be on the lookout for what is truly commendable in people, we must see what is commendable in God.
Everything commendable is rooted in Jesus.
What’s so good about him?
Practicing
AffirmationSlide61
Truthfulness
Obedience
Boldness Forgiveness Alertness
Hospitality Generosity
Flexibility Availability Endurance
Self-control
Diligence
Thoroughness Dependability
Patience
Wisdom
Love
Creativity
Gratefulness
Orderliness
Practicing
AffirmationSlide62
Initiative
Responsibility
Humility Decisiveness
Determination Attentiveness
Justice Compassion G
entleness
Practicing
AffirmationSlide63
The chief end of man is to glorify God.
The chief end of
God
is to glorify God.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide64
Jesus is on a mission to receive praise, even if he has to get it from rocks.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide65
Meanwhile, the Father is so passionate for his Son to receive praise, that his Son’s praiseworthiness reverberates in, through, and from those who resemble him.
The more we resemble him, the more of him is displayed, and the more honor he receives.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide66
The praising of people does not preclude the praising of God, if the people are commended ultimately for
his
glory.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide67
God is glorified in us when we affirm the work he has done and is doing in others.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide68
Stop and write…
… a note of affirmation to someone difficult to affirm.
Stop and pray…
…for your speaker to not be a hypocrite at practicing affirmation.
3. Oppositional
Practicing
AffirmationSlide69
Practicing
AffirmationSlide70
Session 3
Helping People
Get Good at Affirmation
Nuances and Guardrails
to maximize Fruitfulnessand Avoid Regret
Practicing
AffirmationSlide71
Gain a reputation: give so many affirmations as a consistent pattern, as a way of life, that you gain a reputation for it.
What reputation do I want?
Mr. Crabby Pants?
Old Lady Battle-axe? Miss Nit Pick?
Barnabas, son of encouragement.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide72
W
hat is your…
…name?
Practicing
AffirmationSlide73
Generally, our failure to affirm others is not rooted in them, but in us.
Wayne
Practicing
AffirmationSlide74
Affirmation is powerful.
Fourteen year old
Eleven year old
Pig farmer’s wife
Moratorium
Practicing
AffirmationSlide75
This is an advance alert:
Later today we will ask for testimonials of how you have personally seen the practice of affirmation make a difference.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide76
We will become profoundly ineffective in our relationships if we have squandered a hearing, alienated our listeners, turned them off to us…
Practicing
AffirmationSlide77
Even if we…
are right, not wrong
p
ossess the jurisdiction
, the right, even the responsibility to say something
a
pply wise and loving rationalehave good motiveslove the person deeply
have exactly the right wording and tone…
Practicing
AffirmationSlide78
T
he people around us are likely to stop
hearing
us over time if we don’t practice affirmation toward them…
Practicing
AffirmationSlide79
Even if he understands…
t
he psychology of human development
the biblical theology of man and sin
management best practices
the difference between right and wrong.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide80
…the people around him are likely to stop
hearing
him over time if
h
e doesn’t practice affirmation toward them.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide81
Practicing
Affirmation
Ephesians 4:29
Let
no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. Slide82
Proverbs 12:18
There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide83
Effective affirmations are :
n
unattached to correctionn
steady dietn honest
3. Oppositional
Practicing
AffirmationSlide84
Caution regarding honesty:
while “faint praise is damning,” exaggerated praise is false.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide85
E
ffective affirmations are:
n unattached to correctionn
steady dietn honest
n God-centered
Practicing
AffirmationSlide86
Echoing the character qualities of Jesus does not save/justify us.
Jesus saves/justifies us.
Luke 18:9-14
Practicing
AffirmationSlide87
Luke
18:9 He also told this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and treated others with contempt: 10 "Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector.
11 The Pharisee, standing by himself, prayed thus: 'God, I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. 12 I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I get.' 13 But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, 'God, be merciful to me, a sinner!'
14 I tell you, this man went down to his house justified, rather than the other. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted."
Practicing
AffirmationSlide88
In Luke 18 Jesus is speaking to people who:
Talk about God
Think they know how to be right with God.
Note: he speaks not about them,
but to them.It is about esteeming the work of God
in the lives of people.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide89
Luke
18:9 He also told this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and treated others with contempt: 10
"Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. 11 The Pharisee, standing by himself, prayed thus: 'God, I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. 12 I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I get.'
13 But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, 'God, be merciful to me, a sinner!' 14 I tell you, this man went down to his house justified, rather than the other. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted."
Practicing
AffirmationSlide90
He spoke to whom?
It is about esteeming the work of
God
i
n the lives of people.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide91
Luke
18:9 He also told this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and treated others with contempt: 10
"Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. 11 The Pharisee, standing by himself, prayed thus: 'God, I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. 12 I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I get.'
13 But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, 'God, be merciful to me, a sinner!' 14 I tell you, this man went down to his house justified, rather than the other. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted."
Practicing
AffirmationSlide92
Remarkably, the Pharisee not only…
avoids immoral behaviors, and
practices good spiritual disciplines, but…
… gives God the credit!
It is about esteeming the work of Godin the lives of people.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide93
Luke
18:9 He also told this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and treated others with contempt: 10 "Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector.
11 The Pharisee, standing by himself, prayed thus: 'God, I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. 12 I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I get.'
13 But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, 'God, be merciful to me, a sinner!' 14 I tell you, this man went down to his house justified, rather than the other. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted."
Practicing
AffirmationSlide94
As far as we know, the Pharisee might have believed:
my past sins were wicked indeed.
in the total sovereignty of God.
not I, but the grace of God has produced this righteousness.
It is about esteeming the work of Godin the lives of people.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide95
His mistake is that he trusted the wrong:
thing
basis
ground
righteousness personIt is about esteeming the work of
Godin the lives of people.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide96
The God-produced righteousness that the Pharisee trusted was: his own.
And that was his mistake.
He was dead wrong.
It is about esteeming the work of
God
i
n the lives of people.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide97
Jesus is teaching us that no matter:
how morally upright we are
how religiously devout
how aware we are that God produced our
moral appetites and behaviors how much we thank God for them…those things are not the basis of our justification before God.That is
not how we are accepted.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide98
The issue is: are we looking totally away from self?
Look to Jesus alone.
The tax collector looks away from his own works to the work of God.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide99
The issue is: are we looking totally away from self?
Look to Jesus alone.
The tax collector looks away from his own works to the work of God.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide100
Luke
18:9 He also told this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and treated others with contempt: 10 "Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector.
11 The Pharisee, standing by himself, prayed thus: 'God, I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. 12 I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I get.' 13 But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying,
'God, be merciful to me, a sinner!' 14 I tell you, this man went down to his house justified, rather than the other. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted."
Practicing
AffirmationSlide101
Luke
18:9 He also told this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and treated others with contempt: 10 "Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector.
11 The Pharisee, standing by himself, prayed thus: 'God, I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. 12 I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I get.' 13 But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying,
'God, be merciful to me, a sinner!' 14 I tell you, this man went down to his house justified, rather than the other. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted."
Practicing
AffirmationSlide102
Four very sobering words:
Practicing
AffirmationSlide103
Luke
18:9 He also told this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and treated others with contempt: 10 "Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector.
11 The Pharisee, standing by himself, prayed thus: 'God, I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. 12 I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I get.' 13 But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, 'God, be merciful to me, a sinner!'
14 I tell you, this man went down to his house justified, rather than the other. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted."
Practicing
AffirmationSlide104
To repeat:
Echoing the character qualities of Jesus does not save/justify us.
Jesus saves/justifies us.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide105
Even though many relationships fall into trouble over exacting standards, this is not about lowering standards. It is about commending incremental progress toward those standards, all by grace.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide106
Stop and pray…
…for grace to forgive and bless those who have not affirmed you as they should have.
3. Oppositional
Practicing
AffirmationSlide107
Practicing
AffirmationSlide108
Session 4
Practical Applications
of Affirmation
Beyond Good Intentions
to Joyful, Healthy Relational Patterns
Practicing
AffirmationSlide109
Let’s practice affirmation…
Great is Thy faithfulness, O God my Father
There is no shadow of turning with Thee
Thou
changest not, Thy compassions they fail not
As Thou has been Thou forever wilt beGreat is Thy faithfulness
Great is Thy faithfulness
Morning by morning new mercies I seeAll I have needed Thy hand hath provided
Great is Thy faithfulness Lord unto me
ositional
Practicing
AffirmationSlide110
Let’s practice affirmation…
Summer and winter and springtime and harvest
Sun, moon, and stars in their courses above
Join with nature in manifold witness
To Thy great faithfulness, mercy, and love
Great is Thy faithfulnessGreat is Thy faithfulness
Morning by morning new mercies I see
All I have needed Thy hand hath providedGreat is Thy faithfulness Lord unto me
ositional
Practicing
AffirmationSlide111
Let’s practice affirmation…
Pardon for sin and a peace that
endureth
Thy own dear presence to cheer and to guide
Strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow
Blessings all mine with ten thousand besideGreat is Thy faithfulness
Great is Thy faithfulness
Morning by morning new mercies I seeAll I have needed Thy hand hath provided
Great is Thy faithfulness Lord unto me
ositional
Practicing
AffirmationSlide112
The rudimentary desire to be commended is not wrong.
We should all desire to be praised…
…by God himself!
Practicing
AffirmationSlide113
The rudimentary desire to be commended is not wrong.
We should all desire to be praised…
…by God himself!
Practicing
AffirmationSlide114
1Corinthians 4:5
…then each one will receive his commendation from God.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide115
To
not
want to be loved by God and affirmed by God is to be faithless, to expect God to act like something other than God.
Practicing
AffirmationSlide116
It is not wrong to desire…
To be noticed, if we are letting our light so shine that when people see our good works they glorify our Father in heaven.
(Matthew 5:16)
Practicing
AffirmationSlide117
It is not wrong to desire…
To avoid someone’s anger, if you are not cowardly, but are courageously and faithfully leaving vengeance to the wrath of God.
(Romans 12:18-19)
Practicing
AffirmationSlide118
It is not wrong to desire…
To be well thought of, if we are approved of God.
(Romans 14:18)
Practicing
AffirmationSlide119
It is not wrong to desire…
To receive recognition, if we are recognized for having genuine faith.
(1Corinthians 11:19)
Practicing
AffirmationSlide120
It is not wrong to desire…
To feel important, if we recognize we are making an important difference as instruments in the Redeemer’s hands.
(1Corinthians 15:10)
Practicing
AffirmationSlide121
It is not wrong to desire…
To be respected, if we are respected for fulfilling our God-given office in
God-given strength.
(2Corinthians 8:16)
Practicing
AffirmationSlide122
It is not wrong to desire…
To avoid conflict, if our peacemaking is not at the expense of principle.
(2Corinthians 13:10-11)
Practicing
AffirmationSlide123
It is not wrong to desire…
To be looked up to, if we are esteemed highly because of our work in the Lord.
(1Thessalonians 5:12-13)
Practicing
AffirmationSlide124
It is not wrong to desire…
To have a good reputation, if our good name (which is better than great riches) reflects THE Name.
(2Corinthians 1:10-12)
Practicing
AffirmationSlide125
It is not wrong to desire…
To enjoy friendship, if friendship is first and foremost
with
God and all other relationships are
for
God.(Hebrews 6:10-12)
Practicing
AffirmationSlide126
It is not wrong to desire…
To be praised. That desire is perverted when it seeks to be praised for wrong things, or to be elevated above the glory of God.
Practicing
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Affirmations are one form of blessing.
To bless is our calling.
1Peter 3:9
Do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing.
Practicing
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Affirmation is not the same as:
blessing
flattery
building self-esteem encouragement
Practicing
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Affirming others:
nEarns you the right to make suggestions.
nGives energy to people.nLifts morale.
nMakes you easier to live with.
nRequires you to look at people positively.nConstructively uses time that could have been wasted complaining.
Practicing
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Geese fly in formation and honk.
Skunks travel alone.
Practicing
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“It is one of the beautiful compensations of this life that no one can sincerely try to help another without helping himself.”
Charles Dudley Warner
Practicing
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Languages of Love
n
giftsn
affectionate touchn time
n acts of
servicen
words of affirmation . Oppositional
Practicing
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Earlier we gave you an advance alert.
Who has a testimonial of how the practice of affirmation has made a difference?
Practicing
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Steps in helping others get good at practicing affirmation:
Pray for it
(right now).
Model it; refine skill (practice affirmation
). Talk about it. Reward it.
Practicing
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Paul had much to correct in the Corinthians:
serious
doctrinal error
divisions a form of immorality
they were a lawsuit-happy bunch problematic corporate gatherings
misunderstanding and misuse of gifts broad opposition to Paul himself
Practicing
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And yet… in his opening lines he tells them: “I give thanks to my God always for you.”
Why?
“Because of the grace of God that was given you in Jesus Christ.”
Practicing
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Stop and pray…
…by name for those you would like God to help grow in practicing affirmation.
3. Oppositional
Practicing
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Practicing
Affirmation