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Presentation on theme: "Proactive Parenting"— Presentation transcript:
Combining Love, Logic and Consistency
What they mean and
how it affects the relationship you have with your child
Gives orders “Because I said so”
Focus on what the child is NOT doing
Relationship between parent and child is a struggle.
Child feels powerless and misunderstood
Focus on their child not their own needs
Parents constantly rescue their kids from failure.
The message is “yo
u are not capable”
The child is in control and can become manipulative and self-centered
Expectations are clear and concise
The child is given choices
Democratic balance of power
The message is “you are capable”
The relationship between parents and child is balanced and respectful.
Crime and Punishment
How you discipline your child can make or break your relationship
Punishment vs. Consequence
Definition “pain inflicted on a person guilty of some offense.” The punishment does not necessarily have to bear any relationship to the offense. Ex: A child forgets to do his chores and loses TV, video games, phone, ipod, gets grounded etc…
which follows some action
other words, it is referring to cause and effect.
Sometimes referred to as “natural consequence.
you lie often, people won’t trust you.
If you go outside without a coat, you will get cold.
The Cycle of DisciplinePunishment
The Cycle of DisciplineConsequences
This is the Real World!
The logistics of raising responsible children
What is the purpose of consequences?
To teach children and help them learn and grow
To prepare them for life on their own
To teach them about healthy, long term relationships.
To teach long term cause and effect thinking about their behavior.
A Consequence is NOT about power- Kids don’t learn from a power struggle
Repair the relationshipApology of actionRestitution
Using Real World Logic
Is this consequence going to have the same implications for the child as it would if an adult behaved this way?
Child yelling at parents
Child not doing work
Your relationship with your child gives the consequence power
Relationship = Foundation
Take an interest- remember why you love them
Forgive yourself and forgive you child
It is not being permissive to back off and restore the relationship.
Do we as adults respond better to people who take an interest in us?
How do you feel when you anger someone who doesn’t like you?
Positive Ways to Help Kids Learn and Grow
to you child
Use reparative consequences
Let your children make mistakes as long as it is safe.
Always act out of love rather than anger
Pick your battles
Limit your words-no lectures
Love & Logic
will provided a safe and secure environment for the child to grow and thrive.
can help them to understand that their actions have an impact on other people.
They can learn the consequences of their behavior and that they have a responsibility to repair any hurt they have done.