All I can use quotations begin to think about the effect on the reader and try to write a clear response to the statement Opinion Evaluate Textual detail Language Most I can evaluate clearly the effects on the reader ID: 684460
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Slide1
Learning OutcomesKey WordsAllI can use quotations, begin to think about the effect on the reader and try to write a clear response to the statement.Opinion EvaluateTextual detailLanguageMostI can evaluate clearly the effect(s) on the reader, show clear understanding of writer’s methods, select a range of relevant textual references and make a clear and relevant response to the focus of the statementSomeI can evaluate critically and in detail the effect(s) on the reader, I can show a perceptive understanding of writer’s methods, I can select a judicious range of textual detail and develop a convincing and critical response to the focus of the statement
Homework IN: Holiday homework booklets due today! Homework OUT: Practice answers
Title: English language paper 1 - fiction
Date: 29/09/2016
LO: Can I explore how best to answer Q4? Slide2
English language paper 1 - fictionLO: Can I explore how best to answer Q4? 29/09/2016Starter: how successful do you think the author was at describing the ‘Woman in Black’? Was it easy to imagine her?Challenge: can you refer to specific details from the text in your answer?Slide3
By ‘evaluate’, you are being asked to decide the merit, truth or worth of a given statement.You will need to make a clear argument about to what extent you agree.You need to ensure you discuss the language used and support this with examples you’ve found.Slide4Slide5
In the greyness of the fading light, it had the sheen and pallor not of flesh so much as of bone itself. Earlier, when I had looked at her, although admittedly it had been scarcely more than a swift glance each time, I had not noticed any particular expression on her ravaged face, but then I had, after all, been entirely taken with the look of extreme illness. Now, however, as I stared at her, stared until my eyes ached in their sockets, stared in surprise and bewilderment at her presence, now I saw that her face did wear an expression. It was one of what I can only describe -and the words seem hopelessly inadequate to express what I saw –as a desperate, yearning malevolence; it was as though she were searching for something she wanted, needed-must have, more than life itself, and which had been taken from her. And, towards whoever had taken it she directed the purest evil and hatred and loathing, with all the force that was available to her. Her face, in its extreme pallor, her eyes, sunken but unnaturally bright, were burning with the concentration of passionate emotion which was within her and which streamed from her, whether or not this hatred and malevolence was directed towards me I had no means of telling-I had no reason at all to suppose that it could possibly have been, but at that moment I was far from able to base my reactions upon reason and logic. For the combination of the peculiar, isolated place and the sudden appearance of the woman and the dreadfulness of her expression began to fill me with fear. Indeed, I had never in my life been so possessed by it, never known my knees to tremble and my flesh to creep, and then to turn cold as stone, never known my heart to give a great lurch, as if it would almost leap up into my dry mouth and then begin pounding in my chest like a hammer on an anvil, never known myself gripped and held fast by such dread and horror and apprehension of evil. It was as though I had become paralysed. I could not bear to stay there, for fear, but nor had I any strength left in my body to turn and run away, and I was as certain as I had ever been of anything that, at any second, I would drop dead on that wretched patch of ground.
It was the woman who moved. She slipped behind the gravestone and, keeping close to the shadow of the wall, went through one of the broken gaps and out of sight.
As we read, consider the questions:
Is the vocabulary impressive?Slide6
In the greyness of the fading light, it had the sheen and pallor not of flesh so much as of bone itself. Earlier, when I had looked at her, although admittedly it had been scarcely more than a swift glance each time, I had not noticed any particular expression on her ravaged face, but then I had, after all, been entirely taken with the look of extreme illness. Now, however, as I stared at her, stared until my eyes ached in their sockets, stared in surprise and bewilderment at her presence, now I saw that her face did wear an expression. It was one of what I can only describe -and the words seem hopelessly inadequate to express what I saw –as a desperate, yearning malevolence; it was as though she were searching for something she wanted, needed-must have, more than life itself, and which had been taken from her. And, towards whoever had taken it she directed the purest evil and hatred and loathing, with all the force that was available to her. Her face, in its extreme pallor, her eyes, sunken but unnaturally bright, were burning with the concentration of passionate emotion which was within her and which streamed from her, whether or not this hatred and malevolence was directed towards me I had no means of telling-I had no reason at all to suppose that it could possibly have been, but at that moment I was far from able to base my reactions upon reason and logic. For the combination of the peculiar, isolated place and the sudden appearance of the woman and the dreadfulness of her expression began to fill me with fear. Indeed, I had never in my life been so possessed by it, never known my knees to tremble and my flesh to creep, and then to turn cold as stone, never known my heart to give a great lurch, as if it would almost leap up into my dry mouth and then begin pounding in my chest like a hammer on an anvil, never known myself gripped and held fast by such dread and horror and apprehension of evil. It was as though I had become paralysed. I could not bear to stay there, for fear, but nor had I any strength left in my body to turn and run away, and I was as certain as I had ever been of anything that, at any second, I would drop dead on that wretched patch of ground.
It was the woman who moved. She slipped behind the gravestone and, keeping close to the shadow of the wall, went through one of the broken gaps and out of sight.
As we read, consider the questions:
Which words or phrases are impressive? Why?Slide7
In the greyness of the fading light, it had the sheen and pallor not of flesh so much as of bone itself. Earlier, when I had looked at her, although admittedly it had been scarcely more than a swift glance each time, I had not noticed any particular expression on her ravaged face, but then I had, after all, been entirely taken with the look of extreme illness. Now, however, as I stared at her, stared until my eyes ached in their sockets, stared in surprise and bewilderment at her presence, now I saw that her face did wear an expression. It was one of what I can only describe -and the words seem hopelessly inadequate to express what I saw –as a desperate, yearning malevolence; it was as though she were searching for something she wanted, needed-must have, more than life itself, and which had been taken from her. And, towards whoever had taken it she directed the purest evil and hatred and loathing, with all the force that was available to her. Her face, in its extreme pallor, her eyes, sunken but unnaturally bright, were burning with the concentration of passionate emotion which was within her and which streamed from her, whether or not this hatred and malevolence was directed towards me I had no means of telling-I had no reason at all to suppose that it could possibly have been, but at that moment I was far from able to base my reactions upon reason and logic. For the combination of the peculiar, isolated place and the sudden appearance of the woman and the dreadfulness of her expression began to fill me with fear. Indeed, I had never in my life been so possessed by it, never known my knees to tremble and my flesh to creep, and then to turn cold as stone, never known my heart to give a great lurch, as if it would almost leap up into my dry mouth and then begin pounding in my chest like a hammer on an anvil, never known myself gripped and held fast by such dread and horror and apprehension of evil. It was as though I had become paralysed. I could not bear to stay there, for fear, but nor had I any strength left in my body to turn and run away, and I was as certain as I had ever been of anything that, at any second, I would drop dead on that wretched patch of ground.
It was the woman who moved. She slipped behind the gravestone and, keeping close to the shadow of the wall, went through one of the broken gaps and out of sight.
As we read, consider the questions:
Are you able to imagine
any parts
for yourself? Why?Slide8
In the greyness of the fading light, it had the sheen and pallor not of flesh so much as of bone itself. Earlier, when I had looked at her, although admittedly it had been scarcely more than a swift glance each time, I had not noticed any particular expression on her ravaged face, but then I had, after all, been entirely taken with the look of extreme illness. Now, however, as I stared at her, stared until my eyes ached in their sockets, stared in surprise and bewilderment at her presence, now I saw that her face did wear an expression. It was one of what I can only describe -and the words seem hopelessly inadequate to express what I saw –as a desperate, yearning malevolence; it was as though she were searching for something she wanted, needed-must have, more than life itself, and which had been taken from her. And, towards whoever had taken it she directed the purest evil and hatred and loathing, with all the force that was available to her. Her face, in its extreme pallor, her eyes, sunken but unnaturally bright, were burning with the concentration of passionate emotion which was within her and which streamed from her, whether or not this hatred and malevolence was directed towards me I had no means of telling-I had no reason at all to suppose that it could possibly have been, but at that moment I was far from able to base my reactions upon reason and logic. For the combination of the peculiar, isolated place and the sudden appearance of the woman and the dreadfulness of her expression began to fill me with fear. Indeed, I had never in my life been so possessed by it, never known my knees to tremble and my flesh to creep, and then to turn cold as stone, never known my heart to give a great lurch, as if it would almost leap up into my dry mouth and then begin pounding in my chest like a hammer on an anvil, never known myself gripped and held fast by such dread and horror and apprehension of evil. It was as though I had become paralysed. I could not bear to stay there, for fear, but nor had I any strength left in my body to turn and run away, and I was as certain as I had ever been of anything that, at any second, I would drop dead on that wretched patch of ground.
It was the woman who moved. She slipped behind the gravestone and, keeping close to the shadow of the wall, went through one of the broken gaps and out of sight.Slide9
In the greyness of the fading light, it had the sheen and pallor not of flesh so much as of bone itself. (lines 28-29)I had not noticed any particular expression on her ravaged face, but then I had, after all, been entirely taken with the look of extreme illness. (lines 29-31)It was one of what I can only describe -and the words seem hopelessly inadequate to express what I saw –as a desperate, yearning malevolence; it was as though she were searching for something she wanted, needed-must have, more than life itself, and which had been taken from her. (lines 34-36)For the combination of the peculiar, isolated place and the sudden appearance of the woman and the dreadfulness of her expression began to fill me with fear. (lines 44-45)
Indeed, I had never in my life been so possessed by it, never known my knees to tremble and my flesh to creep, and then to turn cold as stone, never known my heart to give a great lurch, as if it would almost leap up into my dry mouth and then begin pounding in my chest like a hammer on an anvil, never known myself gripped and held fast by such dread and horror and apprehension of evil. (lines 46-51)Slide10
In the greyness of the fading light, it had the sheen and pallor not of flesh so much as of bone itself. (lines 28-29)I had not noticed any particular expression on her ravaged face, but then I had, after all, been entirely taken with the look of extreme illness. (lines 29-31)It was one of what I can only describe -and the words seem hopelessly inadequate to express what I saw –as a desperate, yearning malevolence; it was as though she were searching for something she wanted, needed-must have, more than life itself, and which had been taken from her. (lines 34-36)For the combination of the peculiar, isolated place and the sudden appearance of the woman and the dreadfulness of her expression began to fill me with fear. (lines 44-45)
Indeed, I had never in my life been so possessed by it, never known my knees to tremble and my flesh to creep, and then to turn cold as stone, never known my heart to give a great lurch, as if it would almost leap up into my dry mouth and then begin pounding in my chest like a hammer on an anvil, never known myself gripped and held fast by such dread and horror and apprehension of evil. (lines 46-51)
Each table will be given a quotation from the text to annotate. Place your quotation in the middle of a piece of A3. The next slide will give you an idea of how to do this.
EXTENSIONCan you find any other examples of your own?Slide11
It was one of what I can only describe -and the words seem hopelessly inadequate to express what I saw –as a desperate, yearning malevolence; it was as though she were searching for something she wanted, needed-must have, more than life itself, and which had been taken from her. (lines 34-36)“desperate, yearning malevolence” suggests the evil nature of the spectre – the noun ‘malevolence’ has connotations of something being malicious, nasty and unkind. Yet the adjectives, “desperate” and “yearning” suggest a sense of longing; this might evoke some sympathy from the reader and allow us to speculate about that has happened to her.
The ambiguous language encourages the reader to speculate; “something”, for example, is unclear, but is enough detail to pique the reader’s interest and encourage them to consider what the “something” is the woman may be searching for.The detail of the “something” is built up – we are told it she “needed” it, that she “must” have it because it meant “more than life itself” and that it had been “taken” from. Again, we are unclear as to what this is, but the writer’s language is descriptive enough to make the reader know it is
important, yet still be unsure as to what it is. Slide12
In the greyness of the fading light, it had the sheen and pallor not of flesh so much as of bone itself. (lines 28-29)I had not noticed any particular expression on her ravaged face, but then I had, after all, been entirely taken with the look of extreme illness. (lines 29-31)It was one of what I can only describe -and the words seem hopelessly inadequate to express what I saw –as a desperate, yearning malevolence; it was as though she were searching for something she wanted, needed-must have, more than life itself, and which had been taken from her. (lines 34-36)For the combination of the peculiar, isolated place and the sudden appearance of the woman and the dreadfulness of her expression began to fill me with fear. (lines 44-45)
Indeed, I had never in my life been so possessed by it, never known my knees to tremble and my flesh to creep, and then to turn cold as stone, never known my heart to give a great lurch, as if it would almost leap up into my dry mouth and then begin pounding in my chest like a hammer on an anvil, never known myself gripped and held fast by such dread and horror and apprehension of evil. (lines 46-51)
Each group will now feedback. Annotate your own copy of the extract as they do this.EXTENSION
Can you find any other examples of your own?Slide13
I can see why lots of students might have said what they have because as a student I too feel that the extract uses language impressively to describe the situation whilst still allowing the reader to imagine parts of the story for themselves. At the beginning of the extract, for example, the language effectively helps create an eerie image of decay. The reference to the “greyness”, with the connotations of sickness, deterioration and corrosion associated with the colour, helps increase the anxiety Arthur Kipps is experiencing. Moreover, the “fading light” is ‘impressive’ in the sense that it gives some ‘details’, but still allows the reader to create an image of the graveyard in their own minds. The reader knows that the light is reducing, but the extent to which this has happened is up to their discretion. The present tense verb, ‘fading’, suggests continuousness, it is still happening, so the image the reader creates in their head is individual and personal. What is more, the description of the spectre, “her face, in its extreme pallor, her eyes, sunken but unnaturally bright”, “her ravaged face”, “the look of extreme illness”,
“her face did wear an expression”, is effective as it is somewhat ambiguous and indistinct. For example, the word “ravaged”, which suggests her face is disfigured by age or illness or damaged in some way, is detailed, but still vague enough to allow the reader to picture her in their own mind. Moreover, when we read, “
I had never in my life been so possessed by it, never known my knees to tremble and my flesh to creep, and then to turn cold as stone, never known my heart to give a great lurch”, the repetition of the word “never”, and the long, descriptive sentence is
effective at highlighting the fear Arthur Kipps
is experiencing and describing the tension of the situation. The use of the simile, ‘cold as stone’ and the personification of skin – ‘flesh to creep’ – underlines the sense of fear and allows the reader to picture the intense scene as Arthur Kipps stands transfixed with fear at the sight of
Mrs
Drablow
.
On the other hand, some may not agree that the writer allows the reader to imagine the scene for themselves. Some of the sentence lengths, for example, are all very long and perhaps overly descriptive, “
I could not bear to stay there, for fear, but nor had I any strength left in my body to turn and run away, and I was as certain as I had ever been of anything that, at any second, I would drop dead on that wretched patch of ground
.
”, which isn’t effective at allowing the reader to create parts of the story for themselves. There is too much detail about how Arthur
Kipps
felt, and his bodily movement, which doesn’t allow the reader to imagine the scene for themselves and the pace of the text is too long-winded and drawn-out.
Sample answerSlide14
I can see why lots of students might have said what they have because as a student I too feel that the extract uses language impressively to describe the situation whilst still allowing the reader to imagine parts of the story for themselves. At the beginning of the extract, for example, the language effectively helps create an eerie image of decay. The reference to the “greyness”, with the connotations of sickness, deterioration and corrosion associated with the colour, helps increase the anxiety Arthur Kipps is experiencing. Moreover, the “fading light” is ‘impressive’ in the sense that it gives some ‘details’, but still allows the reader to create an image of the graveyard in their own minds. The reader knows that the light is reducing, but the extent to which this has happened is up to their discretion. The present tense verb, ‘fading’, suggests continuousness, it is still happening, so the image the reader creates in their head is individual and personal. What is more, the description of the spectre, “her face, in its extreme pallor, her eyes, sunken but unnaturally bright”, “her ravaged face”, “the look of extreme illness”,
“her face did wear an expression”, is effective as it is somewhat ambiguous and indistinct. For example, the word “ravaged”, which suggests her face is disfigured by age or illness or damaged in some way, is detailed, but still vague enough to allow the reader to picture her in their own mind.
Top answers (16-20 marks) should:critically
evaluate the text in a detailed way offer examples (quotations) from the text to explain views convincingly analyse effects of a range of writer’s choices
Highlight the three strands of mark scheme using different colours.Slide15
I can see why lots of students might have said what they have because as a student I too feel that the extract uses language impressively to describe the situation whilst still allowing the reader to imagine parts of the story for themselves. At the beginning of the extract, for example, the language effectively helps create an eerie image of decay. The reference to the “greyness”, with the connotations of sickness, deterioration and corrosion associated with the colour, helps increase the anxiety Arthur Kipps
is experiencing. Moreover, the “fading light”
is ‘impressive’ in the sense that it gives some ‘details’, but still allows the reader to create an image of the graveyard in their own minds. The reader knows that the light is reducing, but the extent to which this has happened is up to their discretion. The present tense verb,
‘fading’, suggests continuousness, it is still happening, so the image the reader creates in their head is individual and personal. What is more, the description of the spectre, “h
er face, in its extreme pallor, her eyes, sunken but unnaturally bright”, “
her ravaged face
”, “
the look of extreme illness
”,
“
her face did wear an expression
”,
is
effective as it is somewhat ambiguous and indistinct. For example,
the word “
ravaged
”,
which suggests her face is disfigured by age or illness or damaged in some way, is detailed, but still vague enough to allow the reader to picture her in their own mind.
Top answers (16-20 marks) should:
critically
evaluate the text in a detailed way
offer examples (quotations) from the text to explain views convincingly
analyse effects of a range of writer’s choices Slide16
Moreover, when we read, “I had never in my life been so possessed by it, never known my knees to tremble and my flesh to creep, and then to turn cold as stone, never known my heart to give a great lurch”, the repetition of the word “never”, and the long, descriptive sentence is effective at highlighting the fear Arthur Kipps is experiencing and describing the tension of the situation. The use of the simile, ‘cold as stone’ and the personification of skin – ‘flesh to creep’ – underlines the sense of fear and allows the reader to picture the intense scene as Arthur Kipps stands transfixed with fear at the sight of Mrs Drablow.
On the other hand, some may not agree that the writer allows the reader to imagine the scene for themselves. Some of the sentence lengths, for example, are all very long and perhaps overly descriptive, “I could not bear to stay there, for fear, but nor had I any strength left in my body to turn and run away, and I was as certain as I had ever been of anything that, at any second, I would drop dead on that wretched patch of ground
.”, which isn’t effective at allowing the reader to create parts of the story for themselves. There is too much detail about how Arthur Kipps
felt, and his bodily movement, which doesn’t allow the reader to imagine the scene for themselves and the pace of the text is too long-winded and drawn-out.
Top answers (16-20 marks) should:critically evaluate the text in a detailed way offer examples (quotations) from the text to explain views convincingly
analyse effects of a range of writer’s choices
Highlight the three strands of mark scheme using different colours.Slide17
Moreover, when we read, “I had never in my life been so possessed by it, never known my knees to tremble and my flesh to creep, and then to turn cold as stone, never known my heart to give a great lurch”, the repetition of the word “never”, and the long, descriptive sentence is effective at highlighting the fear Arthur Kipps is experiencing and describing the tension of the situation. The use of the simile, ‘cold as stone’ and the personification of skin
– ‘flesh to creep’ – underlines the sense of fear and allows the reader to picture the intense scene as Arthur
Kipps stands transfixed with fear at the sight of
Mrs Drablow
.
On the other hand, some may not agree that the writer allows the reader to imagine the scene for themselves. Some of the sentence lengths, for example, are all very long and perhaps overly descriptive
, “
I could not bear to stay there, for fear, but nor had I any strength left in my body to turn and run away, and I was as certain as I had ever been of anything that, at any second, I would drop dead on that wretched patch of ground
.
”,
which isn’t effective at allowing the reader to create parts of the story for themselves
.
There is too much detail about how Arthur
Kipps
felt, and his bodily movements, which doesn’t allow the reader to imagine the scene for themselves and the pace of the text is too long-winded and drawn-out.
Top answers (16-20 marks) should:
critically
evaluate the text in a detailed way
offer examples (quotations) from the text to explain views convincingly
analyse effects of a range of writer’s choices Slide18
English language paper 1 - fictionLO: Can I explore how best to answer Q4? 29/09/2016Plenary: we are going to write a shared sample answer as a class.Challenge: which sentence starters can we ‘steal’ from the model answer?
Q4: Top-tips: